what a disappointing pretzel day

so, here's what went wrong with my master plan:

first, the new girl didn't start today. apparently, she starts next monday. i just wasn't told. so, absolutely 0% chance of her going to the beet farm or egging a building.

there were no toppings for the pretzels!! in fact, there was nobody guarding the pretzels at all. they were in a box on a table in a conference room that nobody knew about until today. i even came in early today! i was so excited. the pretzels were supposed to arrive at 9:30am. it turned 11am, and then somebody found out they were down the hall, past the men's bathroom. i would like to thank the person who finally found the pretzels. they must have been eagerly searching for them, because there's no need to walk down that corridor past the men's room. if you're a man, you miss it by a few feet. if you're a woman, you're even farther away. and if you've got the munchies, the vending machines aren't even as far down that hall as the men's restroom. so i really wonder how someone found it... unless they were a man (or very observant woman) walking to the restroom, and they happened to notice someone walking out of that room with a pretzel in their hand. they might have asked, or they might have gone to investigate. or, maybe they weren't in need of rest at all, and they were deciding how best to spend $1.25 -- a can of coke or two packs of gum? i think i like this situation better, because the person had a better chance of spotting someone in the know, because a really indecisive person (probably a woman) could stand there for at least 3 minutes and not be conspicuous.

anyway, back to the room without a pretzel topping man. yeah, nobody there. just pretzels -- cold pretzels -- in a box. with some mustard that you could squeeze onto the pretzel, if you so desired. at least there was some variety: they had yellow mustard and Dijon mustard. but nothing else. did i mention that they were cold and just sitting in a box? i could have taken that box and walked away, and nobody would have known! except for my company, because we have security cameras. i'm pretty sure all of the other offices in the building are small and don't have security cameras.

my manager didn't even have a pretzel because he didn't want to break his diet. and i forgot to get him to do a Cosby impression.

not the best day. maybe tomorrow will be better.

word of the day: conspicuous /kənsp'ɪkjuəs/

Synonyms:
adjective: prominent, noticeable, notable, marked, outstanding, striking, salient, obvious

1. If someone or something is conspicuous, people can see or notice them very easily.ADJ ADJ-GRADED
   • Antonym inconspicuous
   • The most conspicuous way in which the old politics is changing is in the growing use of referendums.
   • You may feel tearful in situations where you feel conspicuous.
   • conspicuously ADV ADV-GRADED ADV with v ADV adj
     
     1. Britain continues to follow U.S. policy in this and other areas where American policies have most conspicuously failed.
     2. Johnston's name was conspicuously absent from the list.
2. If you say that someone or something is conspicuous by their absence, you are drawing attention to the fact that they are not in a place or situation where you think they should be. PHRASE
   • He played no part in the game and was conspicuous by his absence in the post-match celebrations.